


The Rush of This

by causeways



Category: Alias (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-01-09
Updated: 2006-01-09
Packaged: 2019-01-07 01:52:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12223332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/causeways/pseuds/causeways
Summary: Noah Hicks was the first man Sydney ever made love with.  She has never told anyone this, not even Noah.





	The Rush of This

Noah Hicks was the first man Sydney ever made love with. She has never told anyone this, not even Noah.

She’d just turned twenty when she met him. She was a sophomore at Berkeley. He went to Berkeley, too: he was a senior. That wasn’t, of course, how they met. She didn’t even know he went to Berkeley until three weeks later. It scared her a little how easily it came to him, this omission, but then considering what they did, the less they knew about each other, the better. Wasn’t it? And this was supposed to be a casual thing.

It was, at first. He was at the shooting range, getting recertified. She was learning how to shoot a pistol. She’d never held a gun before and it scared her a little how good it felt to fit one into her hand, how easy. And when Noah walked up to her afterwards and asked her if she wanted to grab a coffee at the snack bar, it was so easy to say yes.

She’d dated other boys: Fred Griffin for two weeks senior year; Mark Pierce for a month in junior year. She’d gone on dates with others, in high school and freshman year, before SD-6 recruited her. But she’d never felt much of anything for any of them, and after she came to SD-6 she started turning them down. This was even before she knew what SD-6 was. She’d been looking for something for so long and she was beginning to think that SD-6, the possibility of spying, maybe this was it. She wasn't about to let some college boy get in the way of it.

It wasn’t the same with Noah, though. She was a little in love with him from the start. Maybe it was because he was part of SD-6: being with Noah didn’t mean pretending she was some bank intern, secretary in a skirt. He knew who she was, and that was attractive in a way she needed right then. The transition period had started not long before, and she wasn’t entirely used to lying to Francie about her job yet.

Noah appeared at just the right moment, really. Sydney was dying to talk to someone about all the new things she was doing and learning, and she could talk to him. It wasn’t a security breach. He was an employee of SD-6; he’d been through all the training she was going through. They were friends at first. Friends who held each other’s gaze a bit too long and whose fingers lingered on each other’s arms. And there were mornings Sydney woke up in her room desperate for something she could not define.

She’d kissed boys before: Fred Griffin and Mark Pierce both, a couple more in high school, five boys in three hours one infamous evening early in freshman year at Berkeley. But none of that was Noah walking her back to her car, leaning in and kissing her, his mouth warm against hers, and want pooling low in her belly. When Noah pulled away she felt her face stretch into a grin that would not go away the rest of the night, not even as he kissed her again she kissed back.

She didn’t go home with him that night, but two nights later she did. She couldn’t get rid of the want in her gut and she didn’t know what else to do about it. It was distracting her at training and that she could not take. She wanted Noah hard against her as they kissed. She wanted Noah on top of her, pressing down into her. She couldn’t think of anything she’d ever wanted so badly.

It wasn’t perfect, when it happened. It wasn’t quite what she’d thought it would be. But it was warm and wet and Noah, and it was good.

They’d been together two months when she went out on her first mission. It wasn’t much of a mission, not by her later standards, nothing but standard recon work, but at the time it was everything she could have possibly wanted and it was better than sex, better than Noah’s lips on hers or Noah’s hand between her legs. It was exactly what she’d been longing for all that time, the rush of it, and that was what she’d liked about Noah, that he understood this. If he’d just been some Berkeley senior she met in a class or at a party, she wouldn’t have liked him nearly so much. It was the spying she liked about him.

When he disappeared without so much as a goodbye, she realized for the first time that maybe this wasn’t exactly true.


End file.
